What to say in meetings

Words, phrases and lines that will help you navigate every curve ball

Opening a meeting

How can we make the best use of the time we have today?
What would we each like to get out of today?
What is the most important thing we do in this session today?

What's off the table today is ... but what we can decide is ...
Let's acknowledge that...
Right now, what we do know is... what we don't know is...

Guiding towards meeting purpose

Going back to the purpose we set ourselves for this meeting, how about we...
Remember, we said that today we would ... but we wouldn't ...
Remember, in this part of the session we are doing... but not ....
Given we're try to .... today, do we want to do A or B right now?

Can anyone summarise where they think we've got to so far?
We said we'd do ... today - how are we doing against that?
What do we still need to do to achieve what we said we would do in this session?

Bringing together a complex discussion

Let me summarise what I think we’ve just said
What do we agree on and not agree on?
What's the relationship between A and B?
OK, it sounds like we agree on these things …..But we don’t yet have clarity on these things
You're saying, this is what we’d gain from route A but this is what we’d be giving up
It sounds like Surina, you’re saying A and Pat, you’re saying B?

What's the next small action to move this forward?
What information do we need to be able to make progress on this?

Solving a problem

What are the most important concerns we need to address?
What is it we’d like to achieve here?
What’s worked well in the past?
If you could wave a magic wand, what would you do?

What would it look like if we had completely solved this problem?
What would ‘slightly better’ be?
What one thing would make everything 50% better?

Coaching the group

Who is responsible for X?
How can I best support you?
How do you want to be held accountable?
What could you do about that?
Who could help you with that?

What would a great outcome look like?
What are your options?
What are you concerned will get in your way?

Signposting stages and choices

Let's do ... first and then we'll do ...
How can we make the best use of the time remaining?
Would we like to continue on this area, or move on to X?

We said we’d do two things in this session and we’re over half way through now. Shall we stick with the first or move on to the second?
That’s helpful - but not for this meeting / stage of the meeting. Ok to…?

Encouraging contribution and clean comms

Let’s hear all views and then we’ll talk about a way forward.
Please do feel you can share your honest thoughts, even if you think others may disagree / your view might be a problem for others

Shall we do a round and each summarise our thoughts in 30 seconds?
It’s helpful for there to be some healthy tension in this area so let’s hear all points of view and then we’ll talk about a way forward.

Vibe checking

How are energy levels right now?
How are you feeling about progress so far?
Are we going round in circles in a good way - not a good way?! (a bit of lightness is often helpful)
Are we on the right track here?

When's a good time for a break?

Handling conflict and emotion

Talk us through what you’re feeling about this right now.
You feel strongly about that. Tell us more.
Is there something we are missing or misunderstanding?

Validate: "You're saying that ...."
Appreciate: "Thank you for keeping us focused on..."
Boundary: "What we'll do now is..."

Making it safe (strong)

Modelling psychological safety

I don’t know what the answer is yet but I understand that it’s important.
Here’s what we’ve done and here’s what’s not done.
Here’s what we know, here’s what is still puzzling us.

Defending psychological safety

Today we are only looking at the facts of what has happened - not who or why
It's important to share things that we are concerned about - keep going.
It sounds like there is something bothering you about ... Can you tell us more?
Let me check I've understood what you've said.

Cleaning up

Do we feel we have enough information to make a decision on this?
Do we feel that’s a decision? Shall we take that as a decision, then?
Is that a decision we can make here today?
Is this is a decision we need to make now or shall we car park it for next time?
What’s the next step for this? How would we make this happen? Are there any blockers to starting this?

Who does what by when with any crucial how

Who will do this?
By when?
Is there anything important about how this gets done?
Are there any expectations you have about how we'll do this?